After packing our bags (AGAIN!) and hailing an overpriced cab, we headed south to the beachtown of Phuket. Our guidebooks did a poor job in explaining what this place is really like. Imagine a little bit of Waikiki (actually a decent beach), then add all the sleeze of Patpong Bangkok (go-go bars, prostitutes, and he-she's everywhere), and then add another couple thousand tuk-tuk drivers and salespeople all over trying to sell you crap. It's not exactly what we planned for, but fortunately it will be an interesting sight short-lived. Today was spent walking around, doing a little shopping, and telling 5000 people, "No, I don't want your crappy:
1. Fake Armani Suit
2. Fake Designer Watch
3. See-Through Shirt/Swimsuit
4. Chopsticks definitely made of particle-board
5. Brochure to Phi-Phi Island charging me 5 times what I've already booked on my own
Literally, in the shopping area, every 5-10 steps someone else is honking at you or trying to get in your way to sell you. It gets old, and I can tolerate this in small doses. Mostly, I've found ignoring them the best policy to get the least hassle. Only on the rare occasion that they grab my arm do I give them the look or so something verbally to the effect that, "Do that again, you will be pounded into the sidewalk," and I'm on my way, a man of goodwill and Ambassador of strong intenational relations... Perhaps a position remains on Bush's cabinet.
Due to another craving of Western influence, McDonald's was the only restaurant around here that looked good. Then it was on to the bars for a good dose of the nightlife. It was pretty much the worst I've seen anywhere. Middle-aged white men in all directions, courting their night's 18-22 year old Thai escorts. Pure comedy presented itself when we saw some 60 year-old Euro guy in REALLY short cutoff jeans, huge Coke-bottle glasses, a tank-top, a severe limp, and bandaged up from head-to-toe with gauze from an apparent scooter crash. His companion that night looked 20 at most.
After a couple of drinks, we were walking around, the night soon ended after a transvestite attempted to hug me and extend an "Indecent Proposal": "Come to Daddy, OK?!........." OK, that's it. Night's over. Time for bed. I'm BEYOND ready to get out of here and start diving. Good night.
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